If I asked you what the biggest challenge faced by those who want to lose weight is, would you say “will-power?” If you’ve worked with me for any length of time, you would know that answer is not true!
Keeping the weight loss as a struggle of control and will doesn’t work — in fact, thinking this way always backfires. I will explain why:
In life we feel pain. I’m sure most of you have heard the phrase “We are born, we suffer, and then we die.” While I certainly think there is way more to life than this dour outlook (whoever said that was obviously going through some tough times!), we DO suffer in life. Suffering is how we LEARN and GROW as people. When we suffer with pain, our natural instinct is to back away from it. Like a child burning himself on the stove, he instantly learns to not touch the stove.
When we experience the pain of careless words said to us by an unthinking adult; when we experience ridicule from our classmates; when we suffer a bad breakup or sexual assault we can learn to back away from those feelings and actions that led us there in the first place. We learn to distance ourselves from situations, feelings, and people.
One way to put distance between yourself and others is with excess weight.
Our bodies were designed to feel – we are designed as sensation-gathering machines.
If our body does not get the sensation from the “normal” sources, she knows that she can get some feeling and sensation from food (or drinks).
Only when you get back the true sensations that your body was meant and designed to feel will you be able to lose the extra weight permanently.
You not only have the right and permission to feel more, but it will actually help you to break free from the punishment and confusion of not knowing how to be thin and stay thin.
How can we feel more and weigh less?
1. Pay attention. Feel your body sensations as you breathe, as you walk, as you talk to someone…
2. Before you eat do this: sit down, breathe a few times, smell your food, and observe your food. How is your body feeling? Now eat, and as you do, feel how your body will start to change.
3. “Play” in your body regularly. As opposed to the controlling thought of MAKING yourself go running (especially if you hate running!) or really, making yourself do anything, use the idea of using exercise as an opportunity to “play” in your body. Make it fun; change it up from time to time; and vary your intensity based on your mood and energy level.